Small Business Owner Goes to Heaven

Bob, a burned-out small business owner, drives home one night after another hectic 14-hour day. Exhausted, he downs some aspirin and collapses on his bed. Suddenly, a peculiar sound awakens him, and he finds himself face-to-face with a bearded stranger. Now in panic mode, Bob reaches for his gun, only to find it’s not in its usual place — but then, neither is Bob.“Where am I,” he wonders, as the bearded man begins to speak.“Don’t be afraid, Bob, I am Peter, your escort out of the unhappy life you’ve been living! For your own good, I’m taking you to Heaven.”“Heaven?” Bob shakes his head, trying to make sense of what’s happening to him.“Yes,” says Peter, “Heaven’s a place you’ve often dreamed of. However, due to unforeseen circumstances — some you brought on yourself, of course — you really don’t deserve to go there!” Now Bob’s knees are shaking.“HOWEVER,” Peter continues, “Thanks to somebody out there, you’re HERE! And I’m going to give you a first-class tour of the place!”